Why All These Stimulants?

I remembered more than 20 years ago, the first thing I did when I woke up from sleep was to light a cigarette. Puffing cigarette for 5-10 minutes had become a daily routine before I started my day.

In my younger days I loved to start my day with a mug of coffee. Drinking a mug of well-brewed coffee for 15-20 minutes can be great fun.

While living in the village, the first thing I did when I woke up was to soak myself in the river for 10-15 minutes. It was just plain fantastic!

Sometimes I wondered why sleeping nowadays made me even more drowsy. Was it because of late night sleeps? Was it because of work overload? Was it because of peer pressure and family commitment? Was it because of too much worry and anxiety?

And why all these stimulants?

Gone were the days when I sprang up from my bed fully refreshed and restored, ready for big time adventures. Rushing through breakfast and taking a quick bath, and I was ready to go.

But the usual question that kept on popping up nowadays seemed to be, "Why the hurry?"

Is it because I no longer have the desire to look forward to a bright new day?

I don't know. Life seems so boring and everything looks so sick.

Why the hurry? Oh! when have I fallen into this mire pit?

Then I started to ponder, "Just how do I enjoy my life?"

I don't know.

The journey is long and the future looks bleak.

It doesn't have to be that way, isn't it?

But just how do I learn to live a self-motivated life without stimulants?

I resort to meditation and prayer, and I realize that simple fact that I'm alive and breathing.

I try to understand and to enjoy the simple things I do. It does help to brighten my days.

I smile. Then why all these stimulants?

I sigh... I don't know...

You Are So Wonderful To Me

I just can't imagine how important she is to me. She is leaning on me when we are on our trip home from Kuala Lumpur to Kuching. She is plain tired and her face is really pale, and.... she is snoring. We have accompanied our eldest daughter to Universiti Malaya. Earlier, on Monday, we have accompanied our only son to Kolej Mara Banting to further his study. Traveling twice in a roll within a week have really bogged her down. Besides, the intermittent shopping trips and the many house chores had really drained her. I can't imagine how the children fare without her and I for sure can't live without her. My shoulder is made especially for her, anytime and anywhere. She is my beloved wife in her early 40s. And I'm glad to have her beside me.

Love is not just a feeling. But love is definitely emotional and affectionate. God has prepared my wife specially for me. Our life together is a journey full of challenges and struggles. But our love for one another is full of tender loving care. And with each passing moment, our love for one another has deepened with better understandings, respects, and concerns.

Love is not just a thought. Pictures and videos may hold many sweet episodes of romantic moments. But love is that moving pictures that seem to form and reform and transform into many lovely images that tickle my heart and my soul continually. We began with love of many words and many egos. But we have fewer words now but more concerns and considerations for one another. Love has become an on going thought that fill us with optimism and ambition to proceed to quality lifestyle.

Love is not just acting. Gifts and intimacy may do wonders and fill our lives wit more energy and excitement. But true love means sacrificing all we are and all we have. Love has become an on going habit and hobby to satisfy our love ones.

I stare at my wife with love and sympathy.

Her snoring has stopped. Her face is no more pale. She is breathing steady and she is smiling in her sleep.

Thanks, my dear. You are so wonderful to me.